Pros and Cons of being German in America

CONS

1. David Hasselhoff - Not a week goes by I don't here about David Hasselhoff's success in Germany. The crazy thing about it is that his success happened in 1990, almost twenty years ago. It's American network television that actually still puts him on TV. At least he stopped singing though.
2. Wiener Schnitzel - People love telling me that I must love Wiener Schnitzel. I quit telling them that Wien is a city in Austria a long time ago.
3. Having a baby in America full well knowing that we would get some serious money from the German government, but since we pay American taxes, we don't get anything.
4. Heidi Klum - She is pretty annoying on Project Runway.
5. Dieter from Saturday Night Life - Not every German is as crazy about electronic music as it might seem. Even the new AT&T commercial shows us techno cracy Germans.

PROS

1. Going out to eat - Why does American restaurant food taste better than German restaurant food.
2. Having a talking VW beetle on television is pretty cool.
3. Nature - America has a lot of it, and where else can you have deserts, jungles and snowstorms in the same country.
4. Being the hub of all pop-culture is pretty neat.
5. Every American has a Germany story. Somebody was in the military and loved it over in good old Europe. Therefore Germans are popular. We should be happy were not French.